Welcome to the World, Matthew Lucas!

Thursday January 26, 2023

On the morning of Matthew’s birth, I had another Doppler ultrasound scheduled. A lot had been going on the previous few days (see Hospital Stay post), and I think everyone was anxious to see what the Doppler would tell us.

My nurse came and wheeled me down the hall to MFM, neither of us knowing that it would be for the last time and that I would be delivering our sweet little Matthew Lucas in just a few hours.

This Doppler took forever because Matthew was just not in a good position (he was transverse) to get a good read on the blood flow through the umbilical cord or in the brain. Poor Angie worked so hard. She was so patient and kind. When she left, I sent these pics to Dustin and he said, “It looks like he has a black eye.” 😆 I remember wondering if this would be the last time I’d see Matthew Lucas.

Then I waited while Dr. Andres reviewed the scan. I waited and waited and waited. Then finally he and Angie came back in and wanted to look at the blood flow again as well as some other things.
Finally, Dr. Andres said that he was running out of reasons to keep Matthew inside me. They had checked some other things (can’t remember now what they were, but basically they were other things down the line that low blood flow would eventually affect and they were abnormal as well.
So, it was time to deliver. By c-section.

Deep breath.

At least it wasn’t an emergency c-section like I thought might happen during one of Matthew’s really low decels. But still I was not super thrilled.

They wheeled me back to my room to get prepped, and I told my nurse that we were having a baby. She was a bit surprised but was like…ok let’s do this. She was awesome. Shoutout to Makell. Your upbeat, fun personality was just what I needed.

As I got back in the hospital bed, I looked at my phone and saw this gif from Dustin with a text that said, “I hope he’s okay in there.” I was so confused. I honestly had no idea what or who he was talking about. I even asked the nurse if she knew what it was supposed to mean. She had no idea. I called Dustin and asked him. He was still stuck on the black eye thing. 😂

I, on the other hand, was trying to process the conversation I had just had with Dr. Andres and trying to prepare myself for a c-section and bringing Matthew into the world. I had completely moved past the black eye, which is why I was so confused. It made me laugh though, which I needed in that moment.

Then I told him, “oh and by the way, we are having a baby…today.”

Originally the nurse thought that they might delay a little bit since I had just eaten a few hours before. But then the laborist, Dr. Bodnar— who I had just briefly met that morning and said “I hope I don’t see you again” 😆 — came in and said we were delivering within the hour.

I called Dustin to tell him to hurry up to the hospital. He made it just in time.

For someone who has had 3 vaginal deliveries, the whole experience of a c-section was slightly traumatic. The OR itself was the absolute antithesis of comfort- extremely bright, white, cold, and sterile. Those of you who know me well might think the sterile part would put me at ease 😛. As they wheeled me in, however, I remember feeling cold and shaky and everything but at ease.

Everyone was really great though. I had my husband with me— always a calming influence; and the doctors, nurses, and anesthesiologist were all really nice and encouraging. Jack Johnson and Ed Sheeran were playing in the background (probably not my birth playlist of choice 😆, but it’s all good. It actually did help me feel a little more comfortable.)

I took a lot of deep breaths. Got the spinal block. Laid down….in, might I add, what’s got to be one of the most uncomfortable and vulnerable positions possible…Held Dustin’s hand, and we were ready to roll.

They told me I wouldn’t be able to feel anything but pressure and tugging. I didn’t feel the cut, so that gave me some reassurance. All I could see in front of me was the blue curtain. I looked up and realized that I could see the reflection of what they were doing through the light fixture above me… so I closed my eyes. Not something I wanted to watch.

After a bit, I felt something sharp, and then all of a sudden… a. lot. of. pain. No need to describe what it felt like, but I was surprised at how much pain I was in.

The anesthesiologist said he’d give me something nice to ease the pain as soon as they got the baby out. It felt like an eternity, but it was really about 4 minutes from start to finish. I still can’t believe that.

Finally they dropped the curtain and I got to see our beautiful little boy’s sweet face. And of course, it was all worth it.

And then they took him away, and I told Dustin that I was okay and to go with him. I got a shot of fentanyl, and I was finally able to relax for a little bit. In the meantime, the NICU staff was busy taking care of our Matthew….and they were so awesome and walked Dustin through everything they were doing, which he and I really appreciated.

It was about 7 hours later that I finally got to see Matthew, but unfortunately, I was so nauseous that I couldn’t really enjoy it. I only stayed for a moment, but he was absolutely precious and just…perfect. A perfect little miracle.

Thank you to the anesthesiologist, Dr. Bodnar, and all the nurses who assisted in the delivery of our little Matthew. We are so grateful to you all, as well as to the NICU staff who took over and continue to take incredible care of our little miracle as he continues to rest and grow.